Today I had a long chat with an old friend. We hadn't spoken in a while, and somewhere in the conversation I opened up about the burnout (I call it a burnout, not sure what exactly it is) I've been struggling with. What surprised me was that it wasn't unique — he'd been through something similar a few months ago. We ended up talking for over an hour. After we hung up, I realised something that's been sitting with me all evening: I miss my old friends. I miss those conversations. The kind where you'd talk about the future, about the plans, about how we were going to go out there and kick some serious ass (not physically, of course). Those conversations were stimulating . They left you walking away with more energy than you started with, not less. You felt sharper, more ambitious, more sure of who you were becoming. It's the kind of thing that's easy to take for granted when you have it — and impossible to replace when you don't. Life pulls people...
I keep forgetting I have this blog. But today felt like the right time to write something - something a bit more personal than usual. I want to talk about burnout. A while back I was deep in a very large infrastructure project. What started as a technical role slowly turned into something much broader - I found myself handling bits of legal, commercial negotiations, RFP work, supplier discussions. A lot of moving parts. And somewhere along the way, I realised I was doing most of it on my own. The late nights started adding up. Long calls with suppliers making sure the bill of materials was right, checking the solution actually held together end to end, always that nagging feeling that something had been missed somewhere. It just kept going. And then something shifted in me. It's hard to describe. I'd never experienced anything like it before - burnout, anxiety, call it what you want - but it hit me in a way I really wasn't prepared for. I've always been someone who...